juice

Ahhhh, juice. Green, lemony, did I mention green? Without really planning to I am on a juice fast today. I'd like to last until Thurs., which would be a full 3 day fast, hmmm. I notice that as soon as I plan to do something I tend to RUN wily nily in the opposite direction. Like a bratty teenager...oh nooooo, you can't tell me what to do sort of regression into being 15 again and although I knew it was better if I studied, followed the rules, didn't let boys reach under my shirt, I somehow always willed myself into doing exactly what I didn't want to do. This tendency lasts until, well, now. My best intentions always seem to get sidetracked by the little devil on my shoulder. After a rough day yesterday caused by totally drinking too much Sat. night I am motivated once again. This is a recurring theme with me- a boring, repetitive, once again theme with me. So, I'm hoping if I can get through today I can get through tomorrow and accomplish a tiny three day goal to set the stage for something even bigger.

Change is good, but I am scared. What if I don't like the "new me"? I mean, I don't really enjoy the one that let's me do whatever I want to do- let's face it- that me wastes a ton of time and money! But what if a juicing macro peace chic isn't who I really am. It is hard to figure out who you really are- but would I feel such a strong connection to these things if it weren't part of who I am? Food... I mean... juice for thought...